Dear Mr. Right,

One day I woke up thinking about you and I despised it…

for I never wanted to be the girl that lost herself mesmerizing what it would be like with you

wrapped in your heavy arms, lost in your light brown eyes, frozen by the touch of your smothering body on mine.

You have a way of digging into my soul and pulling out the best parts of me.

 But you see it wasn’t your imperfectly styled curly hair or crooked smile that allured me.

Your effortless conversation of telling me what I deserve, or telling me all the ways I should be loved was sweet as honey to my ears.

Yet, I almost resented you for it. You couldn’t give me the affection and love you spoke of.

It’s kind of ironic how life gives every type of love, beauty, adventure and the most perfect imperfections all in one human being

yet you couldn’t have come at a worse time. You’re a bittersweet taste to my future, but even that is not definite.

What if you’re only once in a life time? What if you’re meant for me? … But no! I can’t take you away from her for my selfish reasons.

Surely if I am in love with you, I would support your happiness even if it means I’m just a painting on the wall for you to admire.

I guess I can use you as my muse, my catalyst, my reminder to the type of love I can hope to find in a person.

I hope to God by the time I do, I will have made something of myself and all I would be missing is someone like you.

-Your Secret Admirer