Within The Curse
Location
~style based on Edgar Allan Poe's "The Raven"
Am I only here to borrow this unwanted flesh and sorrow?
While I hate myself to the deepest core
From my mind the loathing rises, onward my heart despises
Will I ever be rid of this cursed body, ugly from pore to pore?
‘twas then my heart horridly replied “Never… nevermore.”
With each burning ember, my mind their only sender
Was a pain so intense, that never could I ignore.
With each “sizzle” and “pop” the torture never does stop
In the mirror, I stare at an unwanted ship. Of which I am titled commodore.
I beg for the nonsense to stop. So strongly, I do implore.
Once again, my heart responded “nevermore”.
As each day passed on, reality continued to dawn.
And, the demon within me repeatedly dug and bore.
Feasting on my insecurities, growing like an incurable disease.
A disease with symptoms that leave me broken and sore.
I ask the demon when it will finish. When shall it be content with its score?
Of course, the simple answer was nothing but, “nevermore”.
Can I take this any longer? Continue to grow weak and somber?
With each passing glance in the damn mirror, a mirror I can’t ignore.
Steadily the disgust rises, my mind filled with numbers, and sizes.
Is this all my life has to offer? All it has left in store?
“Will it ever change?” I ask myself. Ah, but nevermore.
Deep into the madness, filled only with revulsion and sadness,
I try desperately to repair the wounds my demon tore.
But I can only dream, dream of acquiring this mythical esteem.
A self-contentment that I have never obtained before
Never, with myself have I been able to cherish and adore.
And the constant agonizing question I must ask is “Wherefore?”