I would rather lose as myself
Than win as you
But I want nothing more than to be you
To be you would mean to lose myself
But am I such a loss
Am I such a loss when to be you
Seems such a reward
Everything about you is nothing about me
We are opposites
And I stare at your features as if I am in love but like us
It is the opposite
I hate you
I hate to hate you
Because I know my hate is raised
By jealousy
And how disgusting it is of me
How vile
How sick
How insecure
How ugly
How ugly
It is of me to be jealous
How is it I manage to despise
How perfect you are
And how kind
And how caring
And how talented
And how beautiful
How beautiful
You are
Yet I can't seem to manage to fix myself
How could I
It feels as if I ever make any progress with myself
I see you and how far I have to go
And how much I have to do
You can be yourself so
Effortlessly
But I keep on working
Trying to be like you
I'll lose myself bit by bit
To become you would be worth it
I'll do what you do
Think what you think
Act how you act
Because I would lose myself
To win as you
I would rather win as you
Than lose as me