A switch didn’t flip,

the impact wasn’t sudden.

Yet the change felt

just as jarring.

One day, responsible free,

the next, my brown head of hair

poked out a drive-thru window,

a smile and a greeting on my lips.

the first check fell upon

my anticipating fingers.

Not a day later,

I owned my first stick of

cherry red lipstick.

Dad handed me the car keys

that Summer and trained my

unpracticed foot. The same

Summer I began to feel

uneasy to fall under

the male gaze. For once,

I felt like prey.

Everything was different

all of the sudden.

I was free, but

under watchful eyes.

I was unafraid, however

not without caution.

Who knew leaving your

childhood would feel like a

buffer period? An “in between-ness”?