The altar stands merely a few yards away from me.
I sit in the middle and look at my son Reeve.
To my right are my father,mother and husband.
To my left are my son, sister and niece.

We sit quietly as the mass begins.
My father stares at his watch wanting to leave.
My mother prays on her rosary beads
While my husband is too busy picking at his teeth.

My son plays with the book of hymns.
My sister stares evilly at him.
While her daughter plays hide and seek.

We claim to be catholic,
Yet we barely pay attention
Or forget and forgive.

My father and mother barely talk to my brother Steve,
My husband is too busy kissing other girls’s lips,
My son has no concept of respect,
And my sister and niece barely come to church as it is.

Where, then, does that leave me?
Am I a saint for noticing?
Or a hypocrite prick?

Please save me a seat
In pew number three
For me and my lovely
Family of Hypocrites.