Where, oh where, do people get their boyfriends?

Do they get them off of the street?

At WalMart?

At garage sales?

Perhaps they get them at McDonald’s,

The toy in their happy meal!

No? You say they don’t?

Well where do they get them?

Do they get them at Kohl’s, 50% off?

Do they win them at carnival games?

Are boyfriends something you can only get in the winter?

At Black Friday sales?

Do they come in fun size?

Or are they like jewels,

Something you have to search and work for,

Something that can be obtained at the highest price?

Perhaps boyfriends are only for the rich,

Creatures of utmost importance to the economy!

Perhaps they’re rare collectors’ items

That you get from that shady dealer down the street.

I guess I’ll never know!