when I look above and beyound 

I just see all the things I've ever wanted

My heart .. filled was one thing I wanted

Wanted to be filled by him ... who I thought would always be him

I also saw the light of God

The gospals and angels with Eve

That repersents me

Yet she was a sinner

Like me

Who ate the forbidden fruit - But forgot who the culpruit was 

I wanted him but rules of society as God's labelled him as the forbidden fruit

Yet every bite I took like Eve left me alone.

Suffering