so many reasons to hate myself
make for so little time to sleep
silent Insomnia frequents my bedside
she echoes each secret I keep

the fears that lurk in my shadow
which plague my subconscious by light
crawl out from their filthy recesses
and haunt me to tears in the night

still, I cannot express aloud
these struggles, however grim,
because to gripe and moan
would not reflect well upon Him

I know I should be fearless
yet, I can't see how I could
but in this season of contradiction
maybe turmoil leads to Good

and if Good awaits me someday
then maybe Better does, as well
and if I trust in Best Of Bests
then Insecurity can go to Hell

so here's to persevering
even when tears cloud my eyes
and pressing on toward self-acceptance
through this heavy (but thinning) veil of lies.