Unrequited Love

Watching the blue of the evening turn velvet


Indigo lingering like my unspoken hope




None of the constellations were the right ones 


So I collected them up into new arrangements 




I felt on the verge of something a mystery that surrounded me like gauze something I was unlikely to unwind




The moon looked a crooked smile crack in the sky 


A half hearted attempt to hide the stars falling behind her glow


You know


They say the moon holds all the wishes that don't come true 


that's why she's always looked sad


She's holding all the hollow hopes I had for us


Dim lighting shining on broken trust


I wished for a somewhere no one could see me


Watched my dreams float in the emptiness


Easily shattered china doll dreams


I whispered this confession to curious minnows by the creek


Heavy as God and yet they still swam upstream




Sat by the water


Tinfoil boats float


Carry prayers to an ocean I've never seen


I poked at bruises to see glimpses of the pigment I used to be


Tissue paper gives way to reveal caves,


Dirty rooms I cannot bring myself to clean,






I saw organs that don't play


crooked windows


With no shutters


You can read me left to right


Goodnight moon


Goodnight stars


Goodnight Goodnight


This story's no good


Mosquito delicate


Gentle train wreck


Thin like the dial of a very small clock


Moth mouth soft thoughts


Tick tock suicide pocket watch


Diving in ocean eyes to find time lost to the bottom


The sky bleeds


Have you seen?




while children laughed on park slides


I turned you end for end searching for where you hide your love




All I found was some spearmint gum, a pencil stub and some loose change memories of her behind your ear




I am left with evaporated start of


"How did you do that thing that you did to my heart?"


slip of the tongue on the tip of the tongue dripping tipping the scales of love and lust and friendship and trust




I am one more innocently loaded gun hand graze away from falling into the blank space shaped like your heart again


You physical representation of pipe dreams


Night schemes


The aggressive vibrancy of nostalgia against the black and white of heart break




After you said we would never be we


You could just see


All my


Day dreams ripped at the seams


Cloud nine splitting spitting me out 


See me slipping through the cracks in atmosphere


Didn't I tell you the sky bleeds?


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