How to Be Black

-Deal with prejudice, injustice, and racism

-Never attempt to showcase your intelligence to fellow black people; you’ll be perceived as white

-Don’t try to brush your hair during a traffic stop

-Expect to be told you’re in love with KFC, Kool-Aid, basketball, and welfare

-Anticipate Caucasian counterparts to “empathize” with you if a “Black Lives Matter”  protest starts again

-Remember society will always see you as inferior

How to Be White

-Privately talk about black people as objects

-Use a black person’s death as an excuse to get out of school

-Make sure you not only appropriate our culture, but then make it your own

-Always be bad at basketball, and mediocre at football

-Rape someone and swear you didn’t do it; it always works

-No matter if you shoot up an elementary school, you will always be seen as superior