thrive.
there is an onslaught of thoughts
bullying me for egocentric...
but then i think,
in order to change the world,
one must learn how to change
oneself.
-
sometimes i feel like i'm a little
supernova,
as paradoxical as that may be.
no matter how much i try
to solidify my feelings
and tuck them into my bed of
forgetfulness,
they always seem to arise.
they boil my skin
to the point that i'm blistering.
-
my anger strikes out like a snake during
those times where the lava
of memories and
regrets
that i once threw into the abyss
start to surface.
-
if i had to change something about me,
it would be the wiring of my
brain.
yes, you are born how you are born,
conditioned how you are
conditioned.
but i was never meant to hurt others.
i want nothing but to
help.
there is no way i can assist the world,
without getting the chemicals
to stop exploding
within my poor synapses.
-
five years from now, i want to be the head
of a classroom that holds
30 or more kids.
i want to guide a want and need for literature
and information
into their hearts and minds and souls.
how can i do that,
if i can barely survive the calamity
that is myself?
how can i teach adolescents
to love themselves
and to love
their minds,
when i'm nothing but a little supernova
about to explode from
unkempt
feelings, scorching my insides?
-
one day, i will be under control
of this supernova
burning
inside of me.
i will change for the greater good.
the need to educate the generations
subsequent to mine
on how to be themselves
helps my determination
thrive.