Have you ever had one of those teachers?

The one who wants to be your BESTEST friend, like ever.

Who has this overwhelming need to tell your every detail about their child,

To the point you question if your ass is glued to that hard blue chair.

Where over time you develop this hatred towards them.

Maybe it’s just me but my thoughts are never delightful when they open their chapped lips.

Such as…

 

Your baby ate their first solid food yesterday, that’s amazing!

Some of your students can’t get food.

Others only come to school for the free poor quality lunch.

Personally I try to avoid food at all costs.

But you would never know.

 

How cute! Your bundle of joy gets so messy he needs 4 baths a day!

Some of your students don’t get daily baths.

Others are forced to shamefully take “ho-bo” baths.

My siblings struggled to bathe in the shelter they called home for 4 months.

But you would have never guessed.

 

You saved the clippings of their first haircut, adorable.

Some of your students can’t afford the pricey salons.

Others use cheap gas station dyes to attempt to be seen through vibrant colors.

Personally with all the stress it seems mine refuse to stay.

But that doesn’t concern you.

 

Little “Johnny” took his first steps yesterday? That’s amazing.

Some of your students can’t remember being able to walk.

Others trip over their feet walking on their bumpy road to adulthood.

My siblings and I fight to stand daily and strive for better.

But don’t worry; your stupid ass assignment will be done.

 

Oh dear fucking Lord! Now the kid is talking!?

Some of your students are frightened to open their mouths.

Others try relentlessly and only manage to stutter.

Personally my words are always ignored.

But this has nothing to do with you.

 

Damn! The kid made his first friend yesterday.

Some of your students have no friends.

Others childhood “friends” now torment them daily.

My siblings and I are left with few to trust and fewer to call a friend.

But you’re just a teacher; you don’t need to know this.

 

Congratulations! Your child “found” himself and has a purpose.

Some of your students are parentless and feel like they lack an identity.

Others hate who they perceive themselves to be.

Personally my sexuality makes me question who I am constantly.

But you wouldn’t care to know this, right?

 

So please “Miss Z” stop.

We all understand you love your kid,

That’s cool; you’re a good parent and all,

But Just. Fucking. Stop.

 

Every week we hear about a baby passing milestones.

Every week we feel ashamed a child can do what we cannot.

Every day I hurt a little more.

And every hour I know I am falling apart while your child is building up.

 

So keep your stories to yourself,

Continue with your pointless lesson,

And stop trying to bond with us.

We obviously all have our own problems,

Difficulties we try to conquer,

Feelings we try to suppress,

But we aren’t going to tell an adult we don’t trust.

 

So forgive me if your child’s achievements mean shit to me.

Just please continue with your lesson and knowing shit about me.