Things I learned in grade school
In kindergarten I learned that if a girl wants to hug you she loves you. And you should probably stay away from her because girls are gross.

In first grade I learned that if a third grade girl offers to take your lunch box back to the class room, you should love her. Because love is putting your own happiness aside to make the person you love happy. Even though I would never understand that til much later.

In second grade I learned do whatever makes you happy. Instead of playing kickball like all the other kids. My friend and I would run around the schoolyard in an imaginary world fighting off tigers and shooting down aliens and by aliens i mean the girls in our class.

In third grade I learned that parents arent perfect nice people and not every marriage lasts.

In fourth grade I learned that nothing lasts forever. I learned that my best friend was going to another school. Never could I fanthom living live without him.

Fifth grade was the first time i questioned God's existence. I learned that God is not some wish granting genie and sometimes when I needed him the most he wouldnt be there.

In 6th grade I learned about money problems. Christmas and birthdays were the worst days. I had to go to school lying about some shit I didnt get.

In 7th grade I learned that love is complicated and it hurts. I learned the thing that brought me so much joy could bring me so much pain. Cupid's love arrow goes through the heart because only love has the capacity to both mend and destroy you.

In 8th grade I learned about the pain behind a smile. I learned about my two best friends sucidial tendencies. I learned how much a sweatshirt sleeve could hide. And i saw both of them turning to getting high because they felt so low.

In 9th grade I learned that people dont stay. I learned that I hurt the people that love me and love the people that hurt me. And thats just the way I am.

And yet here I am reluctantly going to school day after day. Hoping that one day I might find some new mesning like someone looking for gold. But all that is left in my pan is dirt. And when people ask me why I hate school so much every bone in my body stops me from saying "Im scared of what im going to learn next."