You were my fellow soldier in a darkened city

and when we both got popped and dropped

and rolled over all bloody and gritty

and the cops came and asked everything

over sirens blaring: "what were you wearing"

"did he have an erection while sending bullets your direction"

How was it? Was it hot when y'all were shot?

Goodie Proctors sent us to doctors

covered us with a sheet so they could bring in the fleet

of dectives and fancy lawyers in suits

to catch a man on the loose.

It was honestly tasteless and a lot of time wasted

why call in the feds

when we were already dead.