According to physics,

the force tension in the noose

around my neck is equal to the force

of gravity, 556 newtons, pulling down

on my marionette body, strung up by reins.

The only thing that proves my heart

is still puttering is the blood trotting

through my veins at a velocity of 3 centimeters

per second, as my riding boots dangle

from my numb feet.

Now swing my limp body around

like a lasso. The force tension required

to keep me in motion is 709 newtons.

Yeehaw.