Longing to have what inspires me
to spark a piece of happiness in my sense of direction
& freedom from doubt

Something that once came to me
without much effort
is now hidden beneath my refusal to cry
a promise I made to myself a long time ago

I didn't know then, how much it would take away from me
my creativity; my focus, the trust I had in my own instincts

This is not poetry
it is the lack of it
that has left me abandoned for so long
because I didn't know I was wrong
until I noticed just how much of me was gone