Reflection
Location
He's lost to me, my father's no more
The day that he walked through that door
"I won't be around for a while" he said
I thought that I could never love him again.
A son left alone, a daughter who blamed herself,
when really the fault belonged to somebody else.
Now that he wants to start over, what do I do?
Shouldn't he feel abandoned too?
I don't want him now, I want what should've been
So I run it over inside of my head,
again and again until I feel half dead.
What could I do different, what was so wrong
that a father felt like he no longer belonged?
I'm writing this as the tears fall from my face
wondering if maybe one of these days
I'll find it inside of my heart to forgive
a father abandoning that which was his.
When I look in the mirror now I start to see
My father's face staring back at me
we're not all that different, him and I
But our one difference has changed my life
It's that I refuse to give up on that which is mine.