Oh god, I was drowning. Drowning in the perfection that is my life, perfect daughter, perfect student, perfect friend- perfect perfect perfect. A sea of perfection but yet how I felt like such a misfit. He was my sweet tranquility, the calm in my storm of perfection. He was chaos to my head, but home to my soul. How, I ask myself, How can you be so stupid? Accept your perfection, live up to it and leave him like a child flees from a bee. Chaos was his name, but comfort was his personality and oh how he saved me. The sea that once choked me and beat me and slowly tried to kill me was gone when I was with him. Sweet sweet tranquility, it left me because, he too thought my perfection was most important. That this thing, this stupid word-perfection-was what needed to define me. Not love, not wonder, not adventure, not even happiness. No, just perfection. So here I am again drowning, here I am again, my lungs filling, my breath harder to catch, my eyes growing wider. Here I am, once again, waiting for the blackness to come that is my failure. Perfection that stupid thing, perfection that vicious killer...How can I let this define me?