Peek a Boo

5, 4, 3, 2, 1, Peek a boo! I laughed so hard I could barely breathe

Peek a boo, I don’t know why it’s so funny but I can’t help but laugh

Peek a Boo, my mother stands in front of me with her eyes wide open with a smile only an angel could replicate

Surprise Surprise she replied everytime

“Cover your eyes hunnie cover your eyes or I won’t disappear”

She held my hands and laid them over my eyes until darkness replaced the light

I whisper 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 imagining my mother’s sweet smile I yelled Peek a boo!

My mother’s eyes were wide open

But this time she seemed different

Her gentle smile was replaced by a dark, wrinkled frown

Her hands pressed against her chest, grasping for air, she fell backwards with a thump onto the ground

I ask, “Mom…mom?” Silence answers

I cover my eyes and I count down once more

5, 4, 3, 2, 1 Peek a boo! Her smile didn’t return nor did she move at all

Once more, Peek a boo! Silence answers

Peek a boo! Peek a boo! Peek a boo! I said over and over

I’m 19 now and I still play that game

Because it’s the only time I will ever see my mother’s smile again


Need to talk?

If you ever need help or support, we trust for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741