You held me close

Then left me

I watched you, waited and adored you

But you weren’t elated to see me

Spending all your time working those long hours

Left me all alone to smell those flowers

When you let

He collapsed

A man isn’t supposed to cry, especially one’s father

Yet you made him

It wasn’t your fault

That I was left in that vault

Which was my heart, closed

My emotions gone

But I was strong

I overcame

That fear of the blame

That led me to believe

It was me that made you leave

I stood watching as your body was carried away

I stood as my father’s resolve withered that day

I stood as you convulsed, as my family cowered in fear

But no one whispered in my ear

No one thought to comfort me

No one spent time to hug me tenderly

I stood strong as you cried, unable to speak

I stood as the smell of smoke filled the house

Because everyone else was too weak

I watched at night as your skin went from black to pale

Yet I was that tower, small and frail

I was still strong

When I was told I didn’t belong

I fought back

When my hair was pulled

My temper fueled

I stood strong and found where I belong

Those days where money was scarce and I lived off bread

No one was hovering over my head

Seeing if I was ok

Asking me how was my day

No, I had to walk that dark street

Singing my song of defeat

As that money withered away

Just as you did that unfaithful day

But no, I worked hard

I yelled and screamed

Only when I dreamed

But the world wasn’t as sweet

Watching that darkness cover my house

I felt like a mouse

In this big bad world

In the cemetery, I was curled

As that ice cold rain fell on me

But nowhere could anyone see

The pain and suffering that had befallen me

Because I was strong

I fought back when that hand went smack

Covered my mouth and held me back

I was strong

When they came to take me

I didn’t wonder what would happen to me

Because I was strong

I worried for you

For you who had turned so blue

As I struggled and fought

No more was I taught

The good things of the world

Because now only the bad things swirled

I was handed cosmetics

Instead of the nurturing anesthetics

That could’ve healed me

But no I am strong

I rose up from the world

My heart may be scarred

But no longer am I alarmed

I accepted the help needed

And I wasn’t defeated

I was saved

I behaved

I changed

Following my fate, not prearranged

I broke that cage

I controlled my rage

And learned what it’s like to love

Now I follow guidance from above

That bible direction

Is my connection

To those who care

To those who share

And to those who saved me

So watch me grow

And watch my hope flow

For no longer will I be

Afraid