I cower behind the curtains of the world.

I cower for fear of being degraded

for physical impairments that rarely surface.

I cower behind this curtain so they cannot see 

when I have deflated.

Autoimmune deficiencies circulating,

No soul can detect.

And me- 

a definite diagnosis still waiting. 

Often times, I make my entrance

accompanied by silly, quip remarks,

that lead to the obnoxious laughter from my peers.

Never struggling for ultimate acceptance.

 

With the ability to make people laugh, I have never actually been rejected  

and I still find myself trembling 

behind this stretch of fabric.

Without any idea of why I may be neglected.

I cower in fear that they’ll think I am searching to acquire pity.

I cower with shaking hands,

wanting to pull this cord-

to drop the curtain-

But fear their theory

Of having something "that’s not there."