I never told you my story
Never thought it mattered
Just only thought that getting you past the hurt
And not focusing on what had tattered
Would suffice
Give me a paradise
In the realm where I didn't realize
That my past was real
That everything I went through
Every pain, hurt, tear; was all something I could feel
Feel just from remembering
Reliving the agony beyond my wall
What placed me here
And got me through
Was the determination to never go back
Never to have to redo
I sought to see that it never happened
Thought that if I didn't think about it
Then it wouldn't matter
That if I didn't look at the scars on my arms
Then I could pretend they weren't there
Just if I didn't see how my mom still cries trying to figure me out
Then I could act as though I wasn't full of fear
Tears would come and go
And I wouldn't know why
Pills would seem to help for a while
But at the end of the day, I was back to staring at the sky
Just wondering when my pain would end
When would finally be put out of my misery
Then one day God answered me,
I found u and the rest is history..

6/26/12