An Ode to the Hullabaloo

Before, I guess I was naive, 

scared, depressed, but something more underneath. 

I never stood up, never spoke out, always sat down

and stuttered words about. 

My life before was sort of a trainwreck

messy, erratic, and I was always uspet. 

I had these thoughts that I was never enough,

being the community doormat, 

yeah, life was rough. 

But my senior year came, 

and things started to change.

I grew confidence, a backbone

and dropped people who claimed

they were my real friends.

I chose to push my limits

and strive for the best,

now I know no bounds,

and I will never rest. 

My horizon is evergrowing,

and my intellect overflowing, 

I will no longer stand in the shadows,

frightened by the light,

but flourish forever upward toward the beams 

that wrap around me tight. 

This year is still hard,

with several deaths, a virus, and a longing to be far.

With my love states away, 

and my heart torn in two, 

and the constant questioning, "Which college are you going to?" 

I find it hard to settle down,

to find my own balance,

between the stress and the work, 

it's difficult to find time for my talents.

But now is so much better than the before I once knew.

I live so carefree and alive in this hullabaloo. 

I strive for my goals,

and speak out proudly,

I can't believe I used to be cowardly. 

Today is so great, 

and I know who I've become

a strong, indpendent woman ready to march to the beat

of her own drum.

My insecurities no longer demand a voice,

My flaws are now what hoists

me upward.

My hatred for my appearance is now a fading bad dream,

my weight, my height, 

no longer make me scream. 

These things that once led me astray, 

are now what keeps me floating a bay. 

I guess you can say 

that I now believe in me,

well, the me I've become. 

I don't need reassurance 

or unbelievable pressures.

I just need to be myself

And I guess that's what you'd expect

from a 17 year-old girl,

ready to break out. 






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