I slipe into the car and a threatening silence overcomes me 
within my head i think "How can we be so close yet so far" 
As i try to touch you i feel nothing 
Not the fat in your cheeks or the soffness of your hair 
 I turn to look at you and our eyes never meet 
If they did the emptyness would make me weep
The first cry the first sound 
you sinked 
Septemeber came quicker then you would think 
 And you were stuck with me 
Now i come back to this moment  
This routine 
The words you speak wound me  
And silent tears create oceans and seas 
In my mind i scream and then the doubts begin to sicken me 
Who are we? 
How do i start a coversations with this man?
Are the words i speak so bland?
And if they are just give me a chance 
The car pulls up and i feel distraught 
reaching for your hand
I tremble 
"Please forgive me dad"
But i'm letting go of this past 
And if you can join me then hold my hand 
And if not then 
I Love You but these mistakes will not 
BE MINE