I lie in bed, on somber nights

Just to stare at these bloody scared wrists of mine

All night, needles in my skin

Watcing my reflection in a cold end of a knife

A voice in my

head becomes clear

"Just do it, one

more time, come on it wont hurt,"

i cry at the thought to rid this pain

i cut ohh so slowly skin releasing itself from the veins

so much blood more then usual

i feel weak

tring to wrap my skin in a towel

the phone rings

blood running to fast, so much blood

i answer, my boyfriend asked why im breathing so hard

all i say "help please, help me,"

panic stricken

i sit in the bath

tub

the warm water is hurting me

i feel like im boiling

now the tub is the same color of the blood stained towel

i stare at the lit candle

hoping my pain will die

i sleep but know i wont wake

fire hot tears stream down my face

i pray to god please forgive me

i exhale smoke from a ciggarette

and cant breathe any more

a finale breath whispers from my lips

i die naked, bloody

while listening

for the ambulance that never came.(poems go here)