That one word I said that I wished I hadn't

The many conversations I started but could not finish

I can't sleep,

My mind screams,

Be better,

Cleverer.

Why can't you speak,

Share your thoughts.

Did I close the door?

Turn off the stove?

Lock the door?

Do I have everything?

Do I remember the answers?

Remember your name?

Am I on time?

Too late?

Too early?

My mind screams, 

It won't stop.

Am I more me with the screams?

Less?

I'm the only me I've ever known.