My heart has already let go of you yet my mind lingers on the thought of you.

       What made me fall for you?

        Was it the way you looked at me?

Was it that smile oh that beautiful smile or laugh that wonderful laugh?

                  I don’t understand.

 If I knew what I know now, I would turn back the wheels of time to the day we first met.

   I should have told you every minute, every second of the day that I was hopelessly in love with you.

         Does she love you the way I used to?

Does she embrace the way that I did?

    Does she make you smile that beautiful smile?

Do you look at her the way you used to look at me?

    If I knew what I know now, I would have turn back the wheels of time to the day…to the day we first met.

    I should have told you every minute, every second of the day that I was hopelessly in love with you.

    The past is gone and the future is here…

      How I can make you fall for me again?

 You made me dream a better dream;

    A dream that involved me and you living,

 Searching for answers to the things that were the beginning of an end to our very existence.

  A dream that I never could have possibly have fathom without you loving me, teaching me things I have never known.

 However, the dream ended so fast, so swiftly that the tears no longer fall.

          Gone is the dream of us,

    Your voice no longer exists in my heart,

       Your Name is starting to fade from my lips,

Soon my love will start to become a memory,

    And in time your face will no longer linger in my thoughts.

                What made me fall for you?

 Was it the way you smiled that beautiful smile or laughed that wondrous laugh?

               I don’t understand.

The past is gone and the future is here…

  I can no longer wait for my time is upon me sooner than I have imagined.

She took you from me but you choose her despite my silent disapproval.

                 Will she love you like I used to?

I regret not fighting for you but you gave up on me before I could even try.

   Will she tell you how much she loves you every minute, every second of the day?

     I cried so many tears, I screamed out your name, I asked God and prayed so hard that my hands turn completely white.

                       Still it wasn’t enough…

   You were gone without a word of goodbye and still I waited…

                      Waited for what exactly?

                        I don’t quite know.

   Waiting and having patience were never my best qualities,

                           Yet you seemed to accept them all.

  Finally, it seemed like God answered my prayers because there you were right in front of me yet she was by your side.

   My world ended…

Not because of her but because you looked at me;

            And nothing else mattered.

    There I was that girl and you were that boy…it seemed like time finally decided to stay still even if it was only for a moment.

  The feelings I tried to dispose of came rushing back as if they never quite left in the first place but the look in your eyes;

   I knew that you missed me as much as I missed you.

The look of love in your eyes was directed towards me not her,

      All at once I felt like running into your arms,

           Crying out all things I never said,

 Telling you that I would fight for you and that I would always be your side.

           Ahh how could I possibly done this to us?

              How could I have forgotten who I am?

     How on earth did I forget that I was my mother’s daughter?

                       Reality was the end of us,

                   No matter how much I loved you,

  No matter how much I try to convince my mother that you was right for me,

                  She was consumed with the fact of time.

               Yes, time has always been a cruel friend of mine,

         He slowly makes sure that the happiest moments end quickly;

     And the heart wrenching ones ends slowly as if he purposely designed them himself.

     3 times my age is what you are yet I didn’t mind because you was how do you call it?

                         Ah yes, my most important person.

  She saw the man not just a regular person but I suppose a grown man.

                               I saw the boy and the man;

 I loved both for they were the things that made you special in my eyes.

  The yelling, the screaming, things flying across the room, arguing, bickering, then silence…

       You were gone again and this time you weren’t come back.

 I should have protected you the first time she warned me but I was blinded by hope and my judgment was cloudy.

    I warned you that we wouldn’t last long yet you seemed not to care and wanted me just the same.

    Was I crazy to believe that people will see you the way that I do?

                                  You no longer call,

                                         You no longer text,

    The only connection between us is your sister to whom I ask about you quite often.

                            And so time has passed yet again,

                                    Here I am thinking of you,

         Thinking of the times where time was an ally not an old enemy.

                        The past is gone and the future is here…

   I can no longer wait for you nor wait on the idea of us someday for the time for waiting is no longer here.

       I must leave, go my own way, and find the freedom that I desired to share with you.

 These dreams of mine are too big for this small little town so I must go somewhere I and only I can fulfill them.

            My darling, you brought out the worst yet best of me.

        I wish this was another place and another time but it’s not;

  For if I knew what I know now I would turn back the wheels of time to the day we first met.

       I would tell you every minute, every second of the day that I was hopelessly in love with you;

          But you made your decision and I have made mine.

  Seeing you before I go is something I desire you to do but I am afraid.

          Afraid that the look in your eyes will no longer be there,

    Afraid of the time that has passed, indeed fear has stricken me of any reasonable thoughts I would want to say.

                     I don’t want to leave with regrets,

    Hope is quite a dangerous thing for what I hoped for has long past expired.

The future is waiting for me, my darling and soon I will answer its call.

                             Goodbye my first love,

                    Goodbye to the boy that I used to know,

   The day will come where the girl that used to be will no longer be,

              That the woman will have already taken her place,

                  The past is gone and the future is here…          

                                       Goodbye   

                       For time has once again become my ally.