Of all the choices I have made

having you be a part of my life

was most definitely not one of them.

 

Yet,

you proved to be the most useful

and most grateful thing in my life.

 

You who the doctors try to medicate away

with every kind of pill possible,

not knowing that you are already

the biggest part of me.

 

Before I knew it,

you became my most trusted confidant.

My only ally.

 

You taught me the consequences

of my actions.

Whether it be trusting too easily,

or caring too much.

You were always there to remind me

of the trail of fire following me,

ready to burn me alive.

After all,

nothing burns sweeter

than a heart broken.

 

And I’ve never thanked you

because all this time

I’ve been told you were the enemy,

when in reality,

you were the black flames

leading me away from the dangers

of the blood-consuming red flames.