O Lord:

As you know; there is this terrible thing out there in this world

In fact, it is so terrible that it makes my head swirl

However, I’m not viewing it through the eyes of a spectator

For I went so far into this evil that it blasted me into a crater

That I feel like I can’t get out of

It’s so evil that it’s currently my addiction

It makes me think that its consequences are fiction

But it’s actually a restriction

It makes my soul leave my heart like just like an eviction

And what’s left of my soul feels like it’s under a bad kind of conviction

Am I to suffer from this evil forever, so that not even benediction

Can free me from this living hell?  Because hell is within its jurisdiction

Again, I feel like my soul is under constriction

But what I need right now, O Lord, is your kind of conviction

I’m already suffering under the kind of conviction that Satan gives me

I need your holy conviction to take away my blindness and make me see

That this sin called pornography is something that I need to flee

And not just pornography but lust as well

Because every time I fall under that spell

I end up regretting it, and feel like I’m in Hell

And I can’t handle all these feelings that make my head swell

Oh Lord, what I need right now is you

Not something that can please my sexual desire

Because following that crap is completely dire

To my soul, which I should not have for myself

Because all I do with it is put it on a shelf

Rarely using it

And when I do use it it’s to destroy one’s self

Whether it’s me or someone else

All I do with it is to mess it up

And I…don’t…want….that…

I want you to completely take over my soul

My soul that I feel like has a hole

That no other desire can fill

I need you to take over me and make me whole

So that you may have total control

Over my life and my soul

All that I should ever want in this world

Is to be more like you

To have me die to self

And make me new

So I can see the world through your view

So when you need to use me, you can, on your cue

And not when I need to use you

Just to prove a point

My only goal in this world should be to praise you

And to express it in such a way that everyone can see it

I should be following 116

And I’m not talking about the rapping clique

I should be reading Romans 1:16

And everything else in between

Genesis and Revelations

Because that is what I need right now, a revelation

In my heart

So that I can be a part

Of advancing your kingdom

And not my income

Of the sins that keep affecting me

Sins just like the ones I’m struggling with; lust and pornography

God…please help me

I feel like I’m so far away from you