If I saw you, again I would not want to exchange words I would only want to hold you and hear your squeak from me lifting you off the ground in excitement of getting one more chance to be your little brother. If I saw you, again I would want to exchange stories told a million times over, argue ten thousand times, and make up eleven. If I saw you, again, I would want to make a collage of childhood memoirs, and collective photos to keep in my back pocket.

If I saw you, again the emptiness I feel sometimes now would be complete again. I laugh, I joke, and I play but on the inside on most days I am a hopeless wreck still grieving over the loss of a loved one whom I had an abundance of respect. I miss you so much they have no idea. I close my eyes to hold in the tears, smile to beat the frown, and I joke to keep from letting out the emotional choke. Therefore, I share these words because my admiration for you I wear on my sleeve…This is how I grieve. ♥