In the moment/

It all feels blank/Not extremes/The fantasy/Or the fury/The word that comes to mind/Lukewarm/When I look at you/I’m unsure/My emotions flow/Like a river/Between feeling drawn to/And drawn away/I feel a spark/Like a phantom flair/When I catch the little things/Like the hairs on your knuckles/Or the slope of your profile/And it’s almost something/Like excitement/But it dies quickly/Like fire without oxygen/It’s my brain that smothers it/Overthinking/You say I do it often/I say not enough/It’s that river of uncertainty/That keeps the flames at bay/I can’t feel you/I can’t feel the moment/I think it’s pleasant/It doesn’t hurt/But shouldn’t it?/Even the slightest bit?/And then you reach for me/And our noses touch/That first kiss/Nervous and unfamiliar/That blooms into more/It feels good/Sort of/I get carried away/And I don’t want it to end/Because it’s comfortable/And uncomfortable/Somewhere between/And it’s new/For the both of us/I guess that’s called excitement/You taste like nothing/You feel like nothing/You smell like nothing/But I’m ok with it/And when it ends/Is when it starts/When we drive our separate ways/The clock begins to tick/And the longer it ticks/The more I feel/And I suddenly crave/I want you/To touch me/I want to be ravaged/I am desperate/That distance between us/Is like flint/It tinges my memories with flame/The flame I didn’t feel/In the moment/