To The Man Responsible--

 

Your memories come back in flashes

like the bright white specks when you sit up too quickly

when your head feels like it's whirling

and the white specks blink, blink, flash

diminish

 

I to sit there in pain

like my brain has just been rearranged

remember when you once told me you'd never cause me pain?

 

my sight is blinded

and my chest gets tight

 

these thoughts tornado through my head

obliterating my sanity

my love

my soul 

until my body goes completely numb

until it's just me, you, and these twisted memories

tampered between my old feelings and betrayal 

a recipe for complete self-mutilation

 

and then 

they just diminish 

until their next attack

 

this pain can't last forever

but when will it end?

when will i wake up without being taken aback

by the thought of you not sleeping next to me?

by someone else's hands in the dips and curves of your body?

by you giving life to someone else,

all the while draining mine?

 

I have to get used to the feeling of sitting up slower

taking it easier

until I am over--

once and for all

your dreadful white specks

 

Sincerely, 

the girl who you have already forgotten about