Loss by Claudia Rutilo

I've lost, been lost and no one found me. I have been welcomed but never welcome for the fear of time being well spent. I have this constant fear, anxiety of being judge as if im not worthy of one's last name; or calling one family. I have been hurt too many times. I trusted too quickly, just as quick as my heart has been broken. So not letting one in is easier than  having to spend time getting to know one that may or may not hust you. I've never hurt myself because there is no use in doing so. I love myself, i care too much not to let anyone in. I'm not alone. It just feels like i am sometimes. Being alone can help someone realize what they want in life, know oneself, find a clear path for yourself, for your future. As far as one goes, I have regained confidence in letting people know who i am, my struggles. And man did that feel amazing. Holding on to the feeling, of not being able to trust anyone is crucially painful. Yet letting your guard down is even more imperatively painful, because of trust issues. It's never to late to trust again, just know whom you put your trust into first. Always love, trust and never let yourself be alone for too long because you never know what you will miss until it's gone.




This poem is about: 
My family
My community
Guide that inspired this poem: 


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