It seems we are doomed to watch
the way mankind ravages itself, tearing and yanking
blowing holes in itself until
the Titanic could float better than it.
we see the
wars and bombings and terrorism
prejudice and hatred
the accident of living every day
and the way we keep
putting one foot in front of the other without testing the ground.
one of these days we will lose limbs.
the darkness encroaches,
sinewy arms reaching toward unexpected targets
blood trail glowing in darkness
and I see a glimpse of light miles off
the darkness seems even darker because of it
seeping through my body
I see the people around me
slowly back towards the ray of light
chunks of the whiteness break off and the arms reach, hungry for more
I turn and run for the spot
I know I have to look for it
that I have to look for the sunshine because
if I don't the hands will get me
the voices will talk and talk until
they morph into the people around me.
the arms will tear apart every last shred of life
everything within reach
if I stay here.
so I sprint for the light, that speck in the distance
legs and lungs burning, stumbling over rocks and logs and hidden monsters
splotches of sunlight peek out from unexpected places on the way
they cower in the shadows
I learn to look for them, my eyes attuned, gasping for the air of light
after a bit it comes easier.
I'm looking for it, so the light shows up.
that's what I need: that sunlight
the looking for the good things.
if I don't,
if I look at the darkness and let it rule
if I bow to a Dark King sitting on a dark throne made of
ash and bones of dreams and life itself
if I don't
I will become it
I will consume the darkness and then I will be the beast with the arms
reaching out into abyss around me and I will
pull it in
and add to my own darkness until it is an inverted fire
black hole that slowly peels off my humanity
but there - in the sunlight -
it's beautiful. there is night, but it's different from the dark.
it's full of stars and beauty. you can see the moon
edge of mountains against midnight blue sky
rush of cool air from a whispering stream
the call of an owl, unconcerned questioning.
the daylight -
the sun pours over everything, bathing it in its light
it soaks into things, into me,
turning my skin dark, and my mind happy
it presses into my brain, white light and big windows
makes truth visible
the night is not so scary during the day
so I soak in the good things
the happy things
I tuck them away in hidden pockets and secret passages until
I have armories stocked, brimming,
bustling with light
when the darkness comes again, arms and hands and
screeching growls that reek of rotting flesh of the previous day
I pull out a bit of light, and I throw it to the darkness,
walk away. listen to the way it dissolves the beast from the inside out,
leaving a flower in the sidewalk
all I need is light.