Loathing

To Harry,

 

I hate you. You do not know me, nor I, you.

But I hate you.

You hurt one of the most important people in my life.

To Harry.

You are the reason my best friend breaks down in tears almost every day.

You are the reason she doesn’t trust the world.

You are the reason she flinches from hugs and affection.

You are the reason she wishes to die, you are the reason she screams herself hoarse, you are the reason for the marks on her skin that will never leave her because the memory of what you did to her will never, ever leave her.

To Harry.

Because of what you did to her, she closed her eyes as she uttered those words, scared of my reaction on the other side of the world as I worked on some irrelevant art to make her feel at ease.

Because of what you did to her, she forced her eyes open to stare at my face as I began to understand what she said, she forced herself to blink away the tears that burned behind her eyes so that she could see my face on the grainy phone screen in front of her.

Because of what you did to her, she needs medication that she can't get and affection that I can't give because I'm on the other side of this earth and it’s all because of you, all because of what you did to her two years ago when you told her she was lucky number thirteen.

Because of what you did to her, my best friend uttered the words, “Me too.”

Because of what you did to her, I’m crying as I write these words, I’m crying and screaming at how horrible humans can be and you never tried to be kind, you could only ever be nice when you were trying to get them to trust you so that you could suck out what little resistance they could give because you never gave them a choice, you forced them and now my friend has told me what you’ve done, and I hate you, Harry, I hate you.

I hate you, and I hate what you’ve done to those thirteen. I hope beyond all else that there has never, ever been a number fourteen.

I hate you, Harry, I hate you.

 

With deepest loathing,

A friend of someone you hurt.

This poem is about: 
My family

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