Journey of the Winds

Journey to the Great Unknown
Eyes a glazed and fever flown
Somewhere new,
walk alone
And the old: a stepping stone

Clouds of danger growing near
Wind begins to interfere
People simply,
In the darkness we all fear

The lull corrupts to soothe
Cover up all clues
But we know
its moods
And yet; everything we lose

Again the rains of sadness come
By the prickling of my thumbs
All that is
will become
Can that we pick up the crumbs?

Lonely survivor searches for meaning
Death and distress the sky is teeming
Hope for an
Thus begins the keening

Eventually, the dust will settle
Little fishes stop to tremble
As the stinging, poison
In lives proceeds to meddle

As sun sinks down to sleep
The moon again begins to creep
Softly cushioned
As in a sheep
Until another time to weep

Poetry Slam: 



My oh my, this is simply a magnificent poem. The only critique I can hope to offer is to pay attention to your punctuation. If you're going to have any, then you need to go the extra mile and make sure all of your punctuation drives home the point you want it to. Because even though you know in what way your poem should be read, the rest of us don't. :)

Anyways, like I said, a very powerful poem. I love it, and it really conveys the tragedy that these people no doubt experienced.


Thank you :) I'll be sure to keep that in mind for future poems.

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