It's not the last time

The last time I did something for myself

was last night

cause I went to sleep

like a zombie I climbed into bed

and fell into a sleep so deep

my mom thought I was half-dead

and the last time before that

I sautéed  some steak

for myself

because I bench-pressed 280 at the gym

Last year, The Johnie's, A division III football team

had a non winning season

Last time that happened it was 1986

It just goes to show even when you have the most amazing wins

it never really sticks

 I know those times won't be the last time

it won't be the last time I cook but it is THE last time I've cooked

The last time I saw you I thought I would be over it

I imagined I'd build a bridge of baby cribs and nurse my wounds

till I did

I'd tell myself this was the last time I'd let you pass through my mind

But behind it all it was bullshit

The last time I thought of you I was making this poem

I was flowing in and out of stanza after stanza

and I thought of you and I broke my own rule

I used that thought of you as my own fuel

It was pretty cool

Last year when I got to Brockton High

I remember a teacher of mine telling me

“Ritchy, you are going to do something great in this world.”

I told him “Uh, Thank you! That means a lot”

Of course, I thought “jeez, he must be smoking pot.”

(I mean have you seen me???)

if there's one thing I've learned from being in this generation it's this.

We are a group of people stuck between the simplicity of our parents

and the stupidity of descendants

We're stuck between pick your pants up and sag them

between ask a woman out and bag them

between Nike and Polo

Yoda and....and YOLO

look, it's not really a bad thing

the point is

We're the last generation born in the twentieth century

and essentially we're already ancient

because while we pull our wacky stunts

every nine months another is added to the new generation

we may be topsoil now but with every new season

we get pushed down an inch and we could be fossils by this weekend

So I tell myself a lot of times that this is the last time

or that this last line but it's not

Back when Abraham Lincoln wrote the emancipation proclamation

He promised it would be the last time there would be slavery

But even now I still see slaves in even greater amount

except it's no longer about your body,

you're chained to your bank account

Your picking taxes in the heat

getting whipped by inflation

while the government drinks Iced tea

but the thing is my beliefs are discreet

I was told that in MLK's life it was the last time there would be racism

I was called a nigger just last week.

It's called freedom of speech

I'm spoken on about my mistakes and I'm told and I tell

that these times I've fell have to be the last time

I'm offered a chair so I don't stand up for myself

I'm painted as the underdog

As I dog-ear my issues even if their alarming

Told that I'm just a frog

waiting for a princess to become prince charming

Told that being the big guy is a bad thing

just because I say I'm starving

I know that those words weren't built to last

and the last time won't be the last time

I'm fine with the last poem I did just like I'm fine with this one

Because if I remember what a poet said last

In this world the people you are destined to meet are part of your future

and once you meet them they rapidly become part of your past

but, this is my present to you while I share my present state of mind for all to view

I've mined my last times and climbed the diamonds of truth

to bring you the cold hard facts

If you keep worrying about the last time

You'll trip over the next time

and land flat on your back

and be back in the same situation except it'll worsen

so stop pretending like it's the last time and be a good person!

Comments

Additional Resources

Get AI Feedback on your poem

Interested in feedback on your poem? Try our AI Feedback tool.
 

 

If You Need Support

If you ever need help or support, we trust CrisisTextline.org for people dealing with depression. Text HOME to 741741