It went downhill

Sun, 09/17/2017 - 01:32 -- Alexie

P.R.E.S.S.U.R.E (4x)

 

Pressure 

No i'm okay

I'm okay I'm fine I'm well I'm good I'm great 

Sounds familiar? Of course it is you liar

 It was never this hard back then when did it go downhill again?

Don't worry a poem once told me when you repeat a word it losses it's meaning so why not repeat it again

S.u.i.c.i.d.e (5x)

It's not working the more I say it the more I think about it the more it crushes my heart like an endless succession of cars and the more it makes me lose sanity bit by bit

It was never this hard back then when did it go downhill again?

When did the dark monster start growing?

I love acting

It makes me incorporate someone I can never be

It lets me be someone I inspire to be in front of an audience

I like to say my life is all an act to hide who I really am

Yes I might look smart, well, pretty, and great 

But it's all an act to show the opposite 

An act to hide my deepest secrets

What I do

What makes me really happy

To people it's all well, and great

How envious of i to see they can be themselves without being pretentious like me

How much I wish but can't because of the PREsSure is doing to me

Creeping closer the dark creature grew 

I like being smart 

I like knowing things learning things and solving things

And cause of that people use me as a tool to get what they want

I don't like being a tool however

I like to draw

Usually portraits and cartoons

I like drawing pretty people because of their face so symmetric 

Cartoons because all they will be are happy 

I was never good at perfecting a symmetrical face and there's nothing symmetrical with my eyes 

One is larger than the other

It makes me really ugly when I see myself in pictures

UGLY (3x)

The dark creature almost eats me

I was bullied a lot back then

Im small and stout and I'm aware of that

It hurt me so much like no one would ever accept me

Then I met him

He loved me 

He cared

He stayed

He called me beautiful 

Nothing makes a girl happier than being called beautiful 

The dark creature disappeared 

It was a while but...

Some days he'd stop

He'd stop calling me beautiful

He stopped caring

He stopped loving 

He left

Infatuation is good at pretending to be love

It gets you every time

SUiciDe

It's back and it haunts me it's going to eat me 

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Hi. I'm okay. 

 

This poem is about: 
Me

Comments

Saffyre

Wow. This is amazing. Keep writing and don't give up hope. Never give up.

Alexie

It may be late... However, thank you. I never stopped losing hope. I hope you have yourself a fulfilling life.

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