Life.

Full of compulsory pain, 

hurt,

sadness,

happiness,

love.

 

You constantly say sorry, but you don't need to apologise.

You constantly beat yourself up, but there is no need.

Your feelings aren't a sin. They are apart of this life we live.

 

We find that person, the one that makes us feel something deep down.

You can't understand why, but the thought of them lights your soul on fire.

Although only small, its enough to warm your heart.

 

You're sorry for trying to talk to him.

You're sorry for trying to get close, talking to them all the time. 

It hurts when he doesn't reply, and you apologise like it's your fault he is ignorant.

You believe it is your fault he doesn't like you.

It's not. It never was.

 

It's not like when you meet someone on the internet. 

You can't just forget them, especially when you see them every day. 

He sits there staring at you.

Smiling when you look at him.

But he sits with her as if he is too afraid to be judged.

He is scared. 

He is confused.

Wondering why his flame lights up for the thought of you and dies when he kisses her. 

 

How do you stand tall, how do you fight for what you want?  

When everyone else is constantly beating you down.

Saying you are obsessed, that you just need to get over it.

These are the haters, they can only hope to ever love someone as much as you love him.

You apologise for your friends being annoying, for you being an inconvenience.

Well, I am sorry for being reckless. I destroy everything and I aided in destroying your chances.

 

I know it feels as if the world is crashing down on you.

It doesn't help to receive the pitiful looks,

the laughing eyes. 

The smiling mouths.

The imitations.

Peculiar looks, with meanings we can't decode.

 

His friends that don't like her,

and know you're the better match.

You make him a better person, happier in fact.

 

It doesn't help to hear what they say about you, the way he talks about you.

If he really feels that way, if they really believe that, why can't he fight?

Fight for the flame inside. 

Rather than destroying it. 

Trying to ignore it.

 

She is the sun.

Slowly destroying him.

Trying to take him away from you.

He won't see it coming, but one day she will destroy him.

And until then, she will just continue to burn him as he slowly lets her in.

 

You are earth. 

Slowly being destroyed because he is too scared to fight for you, so he neglects you.

 

He is the people.

It is obvious to the plants and the trees, that he belongs on earth.

But some part of him thinks the sun is better.

Don't regret your decisions. 

Don't regret your love.

You say you want him to look at you the way he looks at her. 

But what you don't know is that he already does.

We are all running out of time. 

But the end of high school isn't our expiry date.

You talk about it as if your life doesn't extend beyond that point, but it does.

I'm not going to say it's the wrong timing, or he will come around.

We don't know what will happen.

But I will say this:

 

You need to find the balance. 

Between fighting for love, but not letting it destroy your life.

My life is a mess, you are one of only two people to see it, so you know.

I managed it, and many people before have too. 

So take your time, take things slow. 

 

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You can't destroy yourself anymore, and when you hit rock-bottom the only way is up.

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