I can't live without him.

He is within me.


He is in my eyes.

I close them and

through the freckled pattern of light

and dark

on my inner eyelids,

I see him.


His cheeks,

his brown eyes,

his nose.

(god I love his nose)


I see his smile.

I watch memories of him

throwing himself back as he laughs.


I close my eyes and

I see our first kiss.

I try to remember how I felt about him

at each point in our



I always seem to remember

feeling the same,

just like this.


I close my eyes

and I replay

every memory I have with him

because he is in my eyes,


and he is in my ears.

I sit alone in a room

but I hear his voice.



a little rasp,

not harsh,

I can just slightly hear

the bumps the words run over.


I hear his laugh

in every dream I have

(god I love his laugh)


He is in my nose.

The air smelled like him today.

Oh yes, I'm sure the air smelled like him today.


I turn my head

I roll over from my pillow

into the space he has been so many times.

He is still there if I close my eyes

breathe in

and listen.


He swims through my veins

seeping into everything I am.


I wouldn't want him anywhere else.

But I am feeling very tired

and I'm missing him terribly.


I think I'll shut my eyes.


And even though

I've got an artificial you

Right at my mind's fingertips,


I am still so jealous of the world

It gets to spend more time with you than I do.


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