I claim I’m lonely
But there’s always a figure right beside me
Walking by me.
Grasping my hand through thick and thin.
I failed to apprehend her feelings from within
All I cared about was the trouble I got in.
All I cared about was those undisturbed nights having fun with friends
Not caring about where or what adobe I laid my head in.
I was having fun
She was home crying
Begging God to watch over me and keep me from dying.
Never attended to her denunciated words
But she said she won’t stop trying
My heart wanted to obey
But my mind wasn’t complying.
But she still held my hand
Through the good, bad, thick, and, thin.
It was only a matter of time before I independently gave in
Only a matter of time before I could no longer run.
Before my shameful ways were done.
My mind and my heart weren’t at unison.
My mama step in and grab me from the depths of hell
Grasping my soul tightly
Picking me up from where I fell.
Raising my soul from the deepest depths of Earth.
Telling her precious child act like her worth.
I couldn’t continue to see the tears falling on her cheeks
Each tear signifying something that I have done.
I was at war with myself, but my mama had won.