Inhale. Exhale.

Inhale. Exhale. 
I've lost something, but I'm not quite certain of what. 
It's feels like when you reach for a wallet or a phone.
Knowing it's there only to find it's not. 
There's a brief moment of lightning panic
as you completely blank on where you left them. 
I live in that moment now. 
Inhale. Exhale. 
I know what I need is close, painfully so. 
It's in the space between heart beats. 
In the lines connecting my memories. 
The dust in my dying mind. 
Inhale. Exhale. 
It had a name I know. 
A name that somehow felt like home.
Like it was written in every cell and every bone.
Yet not at all especially special from the others.
Inhale. Exhale. 
I breathe and I breathe. 
And slowly ever so slowly.
I feel the thrum and vibrations
I feel the noise and chaos 
I feel the endless connected expanse. 
Inhale. Exhale. 
Everything me rushes away like a wayward wave.
I see the rubik pieces of a life in front of me. 
I see the mistakes and the losses. 
I see too the victories and the happiness. 
Inhale. Exhale. 
As ever reality comes rising, looming.
But I see the worries and the fears. 
I seem them and know their weight. 
Like an old pair of jeans or shoes. 
Fitting just to you and so familiar. 
Inhale. Exhale. 
But this is ok. 
Because I remember as you always do.
Where we left the most important things to us. 
I know her name as I always would. 
Who could forget a part of their soul?
Inhale. Exhale.

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