I'm Different

Tue, 03/04/2014 - 21:59 -- Anubis
I'm different, I'm just Different
I'm everywhere yet nowhere, I'm neither here nor there
I'm everybody yet nobody at all
I'm different 
I'm like a missing piece of a puzzle
That's been lost for God knows how long
But now I'm being put into random puzzles 
Trying to see where I fit best 
But when I being forced into place somebody notices that I'm different but puts me in anyway
Then as they push me and prod me into a place they doesn't t fit no one notices the difference between me and all the others 
Because they're too busy looking at the whole picture and not the individual pieces like a bag of Reese's pieces
So when they finally notice that something is amiss
They decide to trash the whole puzzle and I get lost again
I'm Different
I don't just wanna know what type of music you like, what's your favorite color or what's your favorite chic flick
I wanna know what you love, what you hate, what makes you tick
I wanna know what level of Hell you plowed through to get to this moment 
In hopes that I'll find someone who's different like me
Someone who has climbed all the way to the top of the fake crystal stairs of life 
But still had broken glass and thumbtacks stuck in their feet
Only to realize they're still on the first floor 
But I haven't found that person yet, I guess because I'm Different
I'm Different, I've seen more funerals than birthday parties
More caskets, than candles
More obituaries than birthday wishes
And it has caused me to see the world differently
I've been asking myself, the good are dying young so how should we describe the living
Good, Bad,....Different?
I guess I'd be the latter
Because while everyone else is eating the fruits of normalcy at the party of life 
I feel like I'm the person in the corner holding an empty platter
I'm different
I'm like a teenage mutant ninja turtle hiding in the shadows
Living in the dark but helping others in the light
But not enough light to see my face
For fear that the people I've saved will see me as the criminal and themselves as the victims
Even though the only thing I did was save them
But I guess I saved people who didn't want to be saved ......at least not by me
Because you see I'm different 
I read more than I speak 
I see more than I'm seen
I hear more than I say 
And I feel alone in a room full of people every single day 
And that Loneliness is like a purple pill 
A mixture of the red and blue pills that a man in dark glasses gave to me
Telling me to choose but instead of one, I picked both 
Because I wanted to stay in this reality to see how things end but I also wanted nothing more than to escape it
Because I am Different 
Which is not a blessing but a curse
That's gonna put me in a hearse 
Because I'm staring down the barrel of society's gun
And it's telling me to put on this mask or it'll shoot
But I'm gonna die either way
Cuz if I say no  imma get blown away
And if I say yes my soul is gonna be sucked away 
But I digress and tell the gunman I'm different 
And those words flow into the gun 
Dissolve the bullets 
And the gunman runs
Leaving me there holding society's gun
Tempting me to reload and pull the trigger
Making me the judge,jury, and executioner
And most people would get drunk in love
Drunk in love with the power they now hold in their hands
And that intoxication would put them in a trance 
Pushing them to look into a mirror, put up the middle finger, and say screw who I am and who I used to be, then they'd start pulling triggers
Not noticing the difference between you, me, he, she or it
They'd go from being Different to the Same
But I'm Different 
I don't get drunk because I'm allergic to the drink 
And I don't get intoxicated because I think too much to let it push me over the brink
So I pick up the gun and throw it to the side 
And I'm glad I did because if didn't 
The person reading this poem would've truly died.
And if the good are dying young, how do we classify the living when the person they truly are isn't even alive 


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