I haven’t written a happy poem for weeks

Probably because i’m not really into happiness anymore

Except in the mornings

When he loops his arms around my waist and holds me

Our fingers weaved like baskets

And maybe our hearts slip through our fingers occasionally

And maybe i’m so angry all i want to do is hurt him

And maybe i’m so broken and lost that relationships are terrifying

But when he holds my hand and lets me lay on his shoulder

While we’re watching movies that are always fiction

And his promises lay on my finger

And around my neck

Like the stitches that hold me together

Im like fallen pieces of a cliff

You can never put me together but you can hold me

And pretend that these pieces will somehow fit together

In your face i see something of who i once was

Your eyes go out of focus and become something like a picasso painting

Your lips can whisper promises like how america promised native americans freedom

Sometimes they break on the inside rather than the outside

I’m learning love is more like staggered breaths then smooth porcelain

That love is working and learning to talk

You can’t be quiet in a relationship

Your heart will beat so loud that one day it might just scream

Like the way scissors cut through paper

There is no silence when sex is just basic stamina

My feelings are your feeling my heart is your heart my money is your money FUCK

Take everything

It’s all yours because of course it is

You are the flutter of eyelashes against my cheek

The soft flesh of your ear when my tongue meets it

The cut off sentences i give everytime someone asks for my number

I think you’re more than beautiful

Isn’t it frustrating that when you look into my eyes when we fight

That i’m so beautiful that hurting me is hurting you?

Oh wait that’s me, not you

I think that your smiles are the reassurance that you’re alive

That how can this be fake if all your feelings are on your face

Except that’s only sometimes

Sometimes your face is as indiscernible as coins at the bottom of the ocean

And maybe you aren’t all the cliches!

Maybe you are more than the cliches maybe you are the new cliches

Maybe you are exactly what love thinks it is!

Because sometimes when the sun hits your face all i can see is you and all i want is you
I’ve never done this before.

I’ve never been so in love i would change my life for someone

I can’t help but think that these days i’m more heart attacks than human

But

I think there is the inevitable heartbreak in this

And that one day you might leave

But maybe you do love me! Maybe

Maybe you are exactly what i have been looking for and this poem is a fucking cliche in itself

How can you be so incredibly everything but pitch darkness at the same time?

I love you

Even when your words feel more like forgotten afterthoughts then noticing me

Even when your touches are half-hearted and confused

Even when you’re more interested in the air around me then me

That’s okay because maybe you do love me

Maybe that half-baked dreams of tomorrow are the security of forever

I love you, because you’re everything.