how long can you survive without sleep?
science isn’t too sure.
but I can tell you
because I’ve been
burning the midnight oil,
I think the fire consumed all it could
so I feed it my fingers first
to keep on going
fed the flames the rest of me
sacrificed to keep doing
and I
didn’t sleep.
and I think I felt like shit the first time.
stayed up till four woke up at six
like I tumbled out of bed
and into the grave,
undead.
or maybe dead?
how can you live without sleep?
because this doesn’t feel like living.
because I’m crawling from one minute to the next
waiting for the moment I can put down my head
for molasses sweet relief,
slow and inching and too sweet toothaches
and when I’m torn from the obscurity
of sleep and her gentle excuse from responsibilities
my head bruises itself
screaming for more than an instant to itself
how long can you survive without sleep?
not long.
there is moment when you turn your head
and you catch a glimpse
of yourself, somebody you don’t even recognize
because you don’t sleep anymore
and you sit exhausted,
watching movies on fast forward, life on slow motion
are you moving too fast or are you moving too slow?
because it’s hard to tell now
you fell into the yawning maw of space
capillaries spilling starless nights under your eyes
and corroding your brain
leaving a dreaded quiet where there used to be a voice
all I need is sleep
and all I want is sleep
but I don’t.