I’m the first thing GOD ever made from my mother
I question myself how did I ever choose to stay
Never ran away from those rainy days
The days where laughter wasn’t allowed
The days where rapist weren’t wanted
The days were tears weren’t allowed even from a child
I’m what he wants
Even if he doesn’t cum
Feeling my body go numb
How could someone take something that doesn’t belong to them
But how come it fazes me now
Maybe because I was his young masterpiece
And the hell with your tears and sympathy
I don’t need anybody to sit around and cry for me
I’ve done enough of that
But it hurts when you can’t fight back along with the power I lacked
How I never opened my mouth
About how I got that scar on my back
How could I let a man walk free like that
Maybe I’m scared to be judged
Maybe I’m scared to cry
Maybe I’m scared to look at the person in the eye
In the eyes of a man that saw me covered in blood
Along in the dark with my eyes closed shut
There he stood standing over me
Telling me if I ever told anybody that he would do worst to me
My family I will never see
Handing me the phone daring me to call the police
The tears that sat on my face that were frozen
The ones he didn’t care to see
After that day I didn’t see men the same way
Thinking all they wanted was to get laid
Looking for love in all the wrong places
Wanting someone to fulfill that empty place inside of me
Not caring if there is a child growing in the womb of me
Wishing there was something that would kill
I feel guilty
Guilty that I didn’t say anything
Scared that another man would do me the same way
I’m sick of playing these “Nothing’s wrong with me” games
My life will never be the same
I let the pressure and the pain get to me
What can be done now
I’m sixteen and that happen ten ago
Hearing him say nobody has to know
But I’m the one who cries late at night
Not knowing if he’s doing it to someone else
Wishing I could help a young girl like me
Not wanting to accept the fact that same man is now on TV looking for me
Who can I blame?
Who can tell me nothing happened that day?
What would my mother say?
Constantly I think to myself
“I might as well be better off in hell”
Yeah it fazes me
Yeah I’m scared
Never will he see the walls of a jail cell
All because I didn’t open my mouth and tell
Yeah
I was his masterpiece
Look where he got me
Beating myself up
Constantly blaming me
All because I was his young Masterpiece