Oh thou wretched and crusty batch of nature
Thou art the epitome of vile scum
You venomous and treacherous creature
You who hast stolen my last piece of gum

Loathsome passion doth ignite my hatred
Your being only is one of abhorrence
The seconds I view upon you are utterly wasted
Oh but, alas! I shall have my vengeance!

May your thoughts be laden with unbearable guilt
May your spouse be unfortunately ugly
May your gardens be infested with tobacco wilt
And may your children be known for their stupidity

Foolishly foolish fool who thinks only of his own satisfaction
The seconds count down until I shall claim my retribution