Hanging Chandelier

Location

Trudging down the dark hallway

People snicker and laugh

With each step my fear grows

I cannot do anything

I cannot say anything

They are crowding around me

I am a joke to them, a spectacle

Their broad shoulders blocking me

My passage

My feeble arms cannot even

Nudge one of them

But one of them thrust me against the locker

My bones shatter inside of me

My body mangles in a mousetrap as they

Say “Go kill yourself!”

I am silent

I go home thinking it’s over

“How was your day hun?”

“Fine”

“You didn’t tell them about what you are right?”

 

Next day, I reluctantly creep

Into the school parking lot

Three kids spot me, coming

Holding their bats and clubs

“Come here you little…”

BAM! BAM! CRACK!

The wood cracks my fragile bones

A beautiful red sea from limb to limb

Almost like a red cherry fountain

Funny, right? Cool, right? Society hates you

God hates you and you deserve this

“You are an abomination to God!”

 

A bright light blinds me

A white figure talks to the other

Beeps drown my ears like surround sound

A familiar maternal face crying

“Crap!”

I am not dead

 

Maybe I can read the Holy Book

I want to go from gay to straight so badly

Maybe I can “turn it off”

He would not have my creation lead to my inevitable destruction

But how could I turn it off

When I did not even turn it on?

 

Religion will not accept me

My family will not accept me

And society most definitely will not accept me

Because I am different?

Because I play for the other team?

I wish I could into their mind

And turn the switch from

Igorance

To knowledge

 

But

 

I finish the job

I climb the mountain to hell

Constrict the pharynx

Until…no more

An inanimate object

Hanging like a beautiful chandelier

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