You held me in your arms and told me

It would be okay. It’s not.


Its been a year since I saw you last.

I always know how long it’s been.


A year seems like an eternity

And an instant all at once.


I can still feel your hand on mine,

Your laugh rings in my ears.


Your voice calls for me but I know

It’s not you. It will never be you.


I didn’t tell you how afraid I was.

Death had you in his grasp long before he took you.


You were withered but you smiled.

Now I am withered, but I smile.


Everyone says the dead look like they’re sleeping,

You didn’t.


I didn’t cry at your funeral.

I made small talk with people you didn’t even like.


I had a panic attack at dinner,

When I realized you weren’t there.


The scarf you made me is falling apart.

I broke the earring you loved.


They are tethers to you,

Snapping one by one.


I fear forgetting.

Every day there is something less.


Memories slip like water through a sieve.

That’s all that is really left of you.


I just want to curl up in your arms

And hear that it will be okay.


But you’re gone.

And that will never be okay.



Please write more poetry, this was beautiful and painful and I'd really like to read more from you.

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