What makes me flawless?

That’s a good question

Something I’d have to think about

So what is it exactly?

For me, it’s the little things

Nothing spectacular, just those moments

Every day that show my personality

And those times when I come up just short

 

I like to call them my “dumb moments”

They are exactly as they sound

The instances when I don’t quite hit the mark

Making me and several others laugh out loud

Over the years I’ve noticed

The list has gotten quite long

So let me share a few of them

To show just how flawless I really am

 

Let’s start off with last week

Walking down the hall during lunch

Lots of people standing around

The perfect opportunity to embarrass myself

My foot slips out from underneath me

And I fall flat on my butt

Leaving a nice bruise there and on my knee

And busting the guts of those around me

 

Or what about the time when

I tried on an old shirt of mine

It fit just fine when I put it on

Getting it off was a different story

I end up getting my arms stuck inside

And can’t get my head through

So I walk out of my room like this

But before my mom can help, she laughs and calls me an “idiot”

 

Or when I went to Taco Johns

And was waiting for my food

But forgot another man ordered before me

Which lead to this “dumb moment”

The employee walks out holding a bag

And I know him from school

So I stand up and try to take “my” bag

But it’s the guy in front of me

He laughs and offers to share with me

And I tell him I don’t normally steal people’s food

This leaves the employee, my sister, my dad, and myself

Laughing with tears rolling down our faces

 

Let me leave you with this “moment”

When I was learning how to drive

My mom in the passenger seat

I didn’t pay attention to which gear I shifted into

Can you see where this is going?

I stepped on the gas, the engine revving

Yet we weren’t going anywhere

Then my mom asks me

“What does P stand for?”

 

Clearly these memorable moments

Have made me who I am

And yet I’m always amazed at myself

When I encounter a new one

You asked me what makes me flawless

So, here you go

If these examples don’t proclaim “flawless”

Then I don’t know what does